One day I'm really going to give you a piece of my mind. One day, when I'm brave enough, you're really going to hear it. One day I won't hold back, I won't try to protect your feelings or my pride. I will explain how everything you've done over the past few years has screwed with me.
Then I'm going to ask you a question. I'm going to ask you if you knew. I'm going to ask you if you ever did any of it intentionally. Was this ever more than what we made it out to be? Or was everyone always wrong? Was I delusional?
You're going to answer me, and after all this time, I hope you know better than to lie.
From 30 000 feet in the air, I suppose its pretty easy to find perspective. When you're a world away its easy to find the courage. Its easy to convince myself of my steadfast resolve. But I know that as the altitude drops, so will my surety.
Maybe I'll let you play me for another few years. Or maybe one day I'll just explode. Either way, this has been building for too long. I could fill a book with these stories. Everyday it gets harder to keep my mouth shut, and everyday the stakes get higher.
As I fly home, as every minute brings me closer to you, it also pulls you further away. You're further than when I left, and everyday will be incrementally worse.
Thank goodness you're happy, otherwise I don't know whether I could stand to keep quiet, knowing you're somewhere on the other side of these clouds.
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